If divorce is like a death, where’s my food?

No one is going to disagree with me when I say that divorce is awful.  It’s emotional, it’s taxing, it’s expensive, it’s time-consuming, it’s frustrating,…it’s just awful.  Psychological studies have likened it to a death, and divorce and moving are up there with death of a loved one as the top most stressful life events.  What’s odd, however is that we as a society don’t treat divorce like a death.  When someone dies, we worry about the loved ones left behind, and feel a need to take care of them by bringing them food, sending cards, posting thoughtful and heartfelt messages on Facebook, and visiting to help ease the loneliness.

When it’s divorce, it’s a different story.  It seems many friends will scatter, as if the divorce “bug” is catching.  The terms or the process are talked about in hushed tones.  Nearly half of all marriages end in divorce, though we talk about it as if it’s still a shameful secret to be hidden.  We have websites to track a loved one’s illness and to be able to donate to their cause and keep up with the ins and outs of treatment.  Where’s the divorce tracker?  How can someone donate to your divorce fund?

As one writer notes in a fantastic article, where’s your casserole?

Advertisement