Estate planning is more than legal documents: Ethical Wills

When I work with clients on their estate plans, I work with them on the legal aspects, such as their living trust, will, and powers of attorney.  But I also work on other aspects of their estate plan and getting their affairs in order.  For example, I work with them to talk to their family about their estate plan.  I work with them to pre-plan and pre-pay for their funeral needs.  Happy stuff, right?  Well, it may not be the most desired of conversations, but –

• It’s necessary.  If you don’t want to talk about it now, you will at some point.  And if you wait too long, you may not get the chance.
• Once you talk about it once, especially with someone uninvolved like me, talking to the family becomes much easier.
• If you knew what you were doing to your family but not having the conversations, and making them guess at what you want, then you would never leave anything unsaid.

Another thing that I talk to my clients about is an “ethical will.”  An ethical will is a document where you share your life lessons, hopes, dreams, values, history, faith, love and forgiveness with your family, friends, and community.  Gaining in popularity in the last several years, there are several online websites where you can record your ethical will and keep it, or there are forms you can download and/or purchase.  For my clients, I ensure that they have the document then need to record everything they would ever want to, such as the items noted above, in addition to genealogical, medical, military, and other histories as well as other pertinent information.

As we get older, the desire and need to leave a legacy becomes stronger and stronger.  We want to be remembered, for our lives, for our contributions and for our love.  As long as we are remembered, we stay alive.  Creating an ethical will is a way to leave that legacy that is so important.

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Trusts and debt payment: Will a living trust protect me from my creditors?

I am often asked whether creating a living trust will allow the creator to avoid their debts: their mortgage, their credit cards, their other loans and secured debt.  The short answer?  No.

Living trusts are generally created to avoid probate, estate taxes, and allow one generation to pass assets along to the next generation with a minimum of hassle and expense.  Once you pass away, your successor trustee still has to determine what your debts are, pay them from your estate, assess taxes, and then distribute your assets according to your wishes. Living trusts are critical for any family to have, and have many advantages, but they do not shield assets from creditors.

What my debt-averse clients may be thinking of is a spendthrift (or asset management) trust, which does in fact protect the assets in the trust from the beneficiary’s creditors.  Spendthrift trusts are used when an individual or couple want to leave money to someone, usually a child, but don’t want to leave a large amount outright, or all at once.  So, for example, the beneficiary gets a certain percentage or amount at regular intervals (or for specific expenses, like education or health or living expenses), but is not entitled to the entirety of the money until a certain time or age.  In this case, should a creditor come after the child and the money in the trust, so long as there are restrictions placed on the disbursements to the child, then the trust money will be protected against the creditor.  This can mean  a great deal when, for example, there are millions in the trust and the beneficiary gets into a serious car accident with large liability.

In general, however, living trusts do not let you get out of paying your debts. The only way to get out of paying your debts is to not leave enough estate to pay them…which I would not recommend to anyone!

When to update your estate plan

I am often asked when an estate plan should be updated, and in fact I have written on it before.  But it is important to revisit from time to time, particularly when there are new estate laws.  In general terms, an estate plan should be reviewed in two instances:

1. Each time there has been a birth, death, marriage, divorce, acquisition or disposition of property or a business in the family, and
2. Every 1-2 years.

By “review” I don’t mean we need to dig up the binder (you do have a binder, right?), and pore over it, page by page.  No.  What I mean is that we need to think about what is in our estate plan.  You should know it in detail because your lawyer explained it so well to you during the process!  So, you want to review who your beneficiaries are, and whether the property distribution you’ve selected still is appropriate.  You want to review who is your successor trustee/executor, as well as who acts as your agent on your powers of attorney.  Have you changed your mind about your advance directive?  These are the questions you should ask yourself, and it really should not take more than 20-30 minutes.  Go through any changes in your family, and see if those changes, or anything else that has happened in the last year or two, make you want to change your estate plan.

In addition, if you have created your estate plan in the last five years, you may want to contact an estate planning attorney now to make sure your estate plan is still the most appropriate for you given the new laws and tax exemption.

In any event, if you have an estate plan that was created before 2008, or powers of attorney created before 2003, you really need to get an update, or at least an opinion on whether an update is necessary.  I don’t know about other estate planning attorneys, but I don’t charge for an estate plan review, even for those estate plans I’ve not created myself.  So what do you have to lose?

Putting your affairs in order: what documents to collect to save your family

Generally, we think of “putting our affairs in order” as something we do after we get the terminal illness diagnosis from the doctor.  There are many reasons not to wait for that time to get your affairs situated, but I’ll leave that for another time.  Today I want to talk about what it actually means to get your affairs in order. First, though, let’s see why it’s important:

Have you ever been the one “in charge” after someone has died?  No?  Imagine this: your nearest and dearest loved one has passed away.  You’ve talked to the hospital and picked a mortuary, so that’s a process that’s been started.  It’s really hard to talk about your loved ones “body” or “remains” while you’re still trying to process the loss in the first few minutes or hours.  But then you feel like you have to DO something, so you head to the house to see if you can find the “important papers.”  Two things can happen at this point:

Scenario one is that you arrive, and already know where the estate plan is, and head right for it.  With it are all of the life insurance policies, retirement and bank accounts, instructions, pre-need funeral planning receipts and contact information, and smaller things like an address book to get in touch with all his/her friends, a locked box (which you have the key) with all of the computer passwords, safe combinations and the like.  There seems to be a lot to do, so you contact the estate planning attorney, who, after asking you a couple questions, says, “there’s nothing to worry about and nothing to do.  Take care of you, your family, and the final arrangements.  Then call me back in a couple weeks if you have questions, but the instructions should all be there…just don’t worry about it now.”  So this is what you do, as you start calling friends and family members and bracing for the days ahead.

Scenario two is that you arrive, and don’t know where anything is.  Does s/he even have life insurance?  Where are the bank accounts?  Was there a will?  Where is it?  You start tearing apart the desk, closets, cupboards,…and find nothing.  Now you’re grieving, in shock, have a million things to do, and now you can’t find anything.  This adds to your stress, so you call in other family members, who are now tearing apart the boxes in the garage.  Everything is chaos, and still no information.  It’s overwhelming to the family.

Which would you prefer your loved ones experience?

The former?  GREAT choice.  Now, here’s what to put in the file:

1. Your estate plan, with trust and will.
2. Your powers of attorney.
3. Your life/long-term care insurance information.
4. Your retirement information.
5. Bank account information.
6. Pre-need funeral planning documents.
7. Investment account documents.
8. Deeds of property, such as homes, vehicles and boats.
9. Health, disability, auto and property insurance documents.
10. Income source documents (social security, employment, investments, child/spousal support).
11. Credit card statements and evidence of other debt.
12. Important papers, such as marriage/birth/death certificates, passports, tax returns, military or genealogical records.
13. Names/contact information of trusted professionals, such as accountants, lawyers, financial advisors, gardeners, house cleaners or caregivers, home repair professionals (electrician, plumber, roofer, chimney sweep, etc.).

And one final thought: make sure you have at least one trusted friend or family member who knows where it is and what’s in it.

Have step-children or a step-parent? Are you one? How to avoid disinheriting your family in California

Estate planning presents unique issues for blended families.  Blended families are families in which one or both parents have children from a previous relationship.  The problem comes when one spouse dies without an estate plan, or an old or outdated one.  Generally, when spouses hold property in California (or anywhere in the US), they hold it in joint tenancy.  When one joint tenant dies, the other one gets the entire property.

Can you see where we’re going with this?

When one spouse of a blended family dies, then the other spouse generally gets all the property of the couple, often by default.  When it comes time to distribute the assets at the death of the second spouse, the second spouse can essentially disinherit the first spouse’s children.  The second spouse, with all the property in his/her name, has control over the ultimate disposition of the property.  If there is a family rift between the second spouse and the step-children, if the second spouse is negligent in creating an estate plan providing for the step-children, or in other cases, then the children of the first spouse to die can be left out in the cold.

Don’t leave your children out in the cold by failing to provide for them with an estate plan.

An attorney who makes house calls?!

Yes, I make house calls.  In fact, the majority of my appointments are in my client’s homes.  I do have an office in Dublin, but I find that the house calls are more common, more appreciated, and better all around.  Here’s why:

1. Many of my clients are older and appreciate not having to travel to an appointment.  I had a client who lived just about 6 miles from my office, but in his mind, my office was in another country!
2. I offer flexible appointment times, such as weekends and evenings, so making the appointment at a client’s home is easier for travel.
3. I appreciate being able to avoid Bay Area traffic, so I work with my clients so we all avoid it.
4. I am not the kind of attorney who sits in her office all day, waiting for the phone to ring, so I am often on the go anyway.
5. It’s not weird.  Really, it never is.  We usually sit in the dining room, at the table, and everyone is more relaxed and comfortable.
6. Ah, comfort.  No one likes to talk about their eventual demise and dividing up their stuff amongst their family.  Being in a safe, familiar environment instead of a stuffy attorney’s office can make it easier (not that my office is stuffy!).
7.  I work with networking partners who work all over the Bay Area, and if I have a referral from Santa Rosa or South San Jose, I can work with them due to my willingness to travel.

My tag line is “Unlike any attorney you’ve ever met.”  I use this because many of my clients, friends and referral partners tell me this.  I want to blast the stereotypes of lawyers being distant, hard to reach and talk to, stuffy, boring, inflexible, and dismissive.  I know that my clients are putting their lives into my hands, so I want to treat that as if it is the most precious gift, as it is.  My clients and their families deserve the best, so this is what I give to them.

Planning for the worst: are estate planning attorneys doomsdayers?

Doomsdayer: one who speaks of Judgment Day or is characterized by predictions of disaster.  I was just writing about what happens when new parents find themselves in an accident and disabled…simultaneously.  The chances of this happening, I suppose, are not very great.  But the consequences if it should happen are so great that I think it is imperative to plan for it.

We have insurance for our homes, our cars, our lives, our businesses, and our health.  Other than health insurance, how often do we need that insurance?  If you weren’t required to have car insurance, would you have it?  Is it really worth it to pay monthly for a once-yearly flat tire change or jump?  How many accidents are we in yearly?  I mean individually – how many have you been in?  I have been in one in 22 years of driving.  Property insurance is another beast: the chance may be small that we lose our home to fire or earthquake or tornado or theft, but the devastation would be so complete, the insurance is well worth it. But we don’t create estate plans as a matter of course, as I think we should.  An estate plan is a kind of insurance for your family, that when you’re gone, your family and your estate, the assets you’ve worked your whole life to accumulate, will be protected.

So, why, when it comes to estate planning, do we avoid it?  We know we are all, without a doubt, going to die someday.  We know that, unless our gross estate has less than $100,000 in it (for California) – any0ne with a house, really – that our estate will go through probate.  We know that young people die every day.  We know that probate takes 2-3 to 5-6 years to complete and can cost our family, can take the inheritance from our heirs, in the amount of 8-10% of the gross estate.  We know our family will suffer having to take our estate through probate, and that creating an estate plan will avoid it entirely, give our family a painless, quick, very low cost transfer of our entire estate…and yet we put it off and put it off and put it off.

Why?

Estate planning for new parents in California

Your bundle of joy has arrived, and now you’re trying to figure out the new schedule and when you’ll ever get any sleep again.  Also, in the back of your mind, you know that you should probably “do something” about your will or figure out what will happen should you pass away.  Now there’s another life to worry about!  But time passes, you don’t know what to do or how to do it, or who to ask, so it gets placed on the back burner.  Suddenly Junior is 14 and you’re dealing with the death of your parents.  What are the things you wish you had known when Junior was a baby?

1. The time to do your estate planning is NOW.  Should both parents be in an accident and hospitalized for a period of time (or, obviously, if you die), Junior could end up in the court system and/or in foster care.  If you do not choose who will care for your child if you cannot, then the court will decide.
2. Having the court decide who will be the guardian for your child is NOT what you want.  When the court decides, the court does not have the time or ability to distinguish between your crazy Aunt Rose, who you have not seen in years, who lives in a small town in Arkansas (not that there’s anything wrong with Arkansas) and can’t seem to keep a steady job, and your sister and brother-in-law who are close to the entire family and would be the perfect guardians.  If YOU don’t decide who is going to raise your child, a stranger will.
3. Not being able to decide on who your guardian will be it not a good excuse for delaying your estate plan.  A good estate planner will help you decide.  In addition, while you may not have decided definitively, you have probably narrowed the field among the options.  Remember, the court won’t know who you have ruled out.  I can help you to know what to think about, what to consider in making the decision, how to make the decision, and how and when to change it.

Don’t wait.  Once you have a child, it’s time to put your affairs in order.  You love your family and you love your child: it’s them, not you, who will suffer if you neglect these very important tasks.

Demystifying the estate planning process in California

The estate planning process is often put off because of the feeling that it is a long, difficult process.  There are a lot of decisions to be made, a lot of time to be spent on making the decisions, and lots of long, boring meetings with the attorney.

Not so!  Well, perhaps this is the case with other attorneys, but I have found that my clients appreciate the ease of the process as well as the flexibility.

The reality of it is – unfortunately – putting estate planning off until too late can mean a long, difficult, expensive probate process where your family, those you love the most in this world, suffer.

Making Decisions

This can be, and often is, the most difficult part of the estate planning process.  In fact, it often prevents the clients from proceeding.  What most potential clients don’t realize is that I can help you to make the decisions.  One of the advantages to creating a living trust as opposed to just a will is the ease with which changes are made.  I encourage my clients to make the best decision for right now, and then change it if circumstances change.  Plus, actually making a decision is critical.  Most couples may not have it nailed down who they want to be their children’s guardian, for example, but they have narrowed the field.  By not picking someone, if something should happen to them, then the position is open to anyone in the world who wants to petition, including those who the couple has excluded (and perhaps for good reason!).  It not only makes the issue of who will raise your children a crap shoot, but also could subject your child to a nasty custody battle.

The Process

I meet with my clients for an initial, no fee consultation to discuss their situation and potential estate planning needs.  We go over what they have, what they want, and the various options available to them.  Generally at that point most of the decisions are made, but sometimes a few remain to be decided.  Once all the decisions are made, we set a time for the estate plan closing.  This is a meeting where we sign all of the paperwork, and this takes about 90 minutes.  Other than the trust funding, which is straightforward, that is the extent of the process.  Usually just two meetings, the process is not nearly as daunting as it may seem.

So, what are you waiting for?

Why do we prepare for our vacations more carefully than for taking care of our families when we’re gone permanently?

Think back to your last vacation.  Sandy beaches or historical tours or thrill rides and cotton candy.  Got it?  Now think back to how you prepared for your vacation.

Did you put a special “I’m on vacation” message on your voicemail?

Did you create an auto-respond email saying you’d be gone?

Did you put a stop on your mail or newspaper?  Set a light to go on in the evening?

Did you have someone come to water your plants or care for your pets?

That’s a lot of planning for one vacation.  So, what kind of planning have you done for that vacation you’ll not be returning from?  What happens when you pass on from the earthly plane?  What kind of planning have you done for that kind of absence?  Anything?

If you’ve not done your estate plan, consider this:  what are the reasons why you go to so much trouble when you leave town for a few days or weeks?  It’s because, if you don’t, then when you return, there’s likely to be upset and angry clients/friends/family members who have been wondering where you are.  They want to know where the project is or the weekly communication or the return phone call.  They’re worried!  And you don’t want to worry them – or make them angry – so you do all of these little things to make sure they’re taken care of while you’re gone.  Same with the plants and the dog: without you caring for them, you make arrangements so they’re cared for.

But, when you go on that permanent vacation, you won’t be back to see the hurt and devastation you leave behind (if you don’t plan).  Your family, those closest to you, will bear the burden of your lack of planning.  And you’ll never know because you’ll be gone.

Consider making an estate plan – ANY estate plan – and use at least as much consideration as you would if you were going on a long vacation.  Your family is worth it.