Avoiding regrets in California divorce

Individuals experiencing divorce often say and do things that seem out of character, and often they are making decisions both under pressure and under extreme emotional burden.  I try to counsel my clients to try to make decisions that they can look back on with satisfaction. I try to counsel them that the anger, bitterness, and resentment do not serve them or help them in the process of getting through a divorce.  Divorce is difficult enough by itself, and when you add angry emotions, it’s worse for you and your children.  One of the ways to try to ensure that you’re making the right decision is to fast forward into the future, and ask if your future self (and children) will look back and think it was a good idea, once the hurt has already passed.  Ask yourself about the reasons for your actions – are you acting out of spite or to do something hurtful to your ex? Or are you doing what YOU need to get through this time?  During the divorce process, you can make decisions that have very long-reaching consequences. Being too emotional – too hurt, too angry, too resentful – you run the risk of making bad decisions that you’ll regret.

One woman discusses this very issue in a recent Huffington Post article.


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